As Family Office conference season ramps up, many sponsors, fund managers, operators, and service providers are preparing for events with one goal in mind: finding investors. Yet according to Family Office experts AdaPia Derrico and Melanie Legamaro, that mindset is often exactly what prevents meaningful relationships from forming in the first place.
During a recent Family Office Access Workshop hosted by ISS Market Intelligence, Derrico and Legamaro shared a practical framework for building relationships before, during, and after Family Office events. Their core message was simple: success doesn’t come from delivering the perfect pitch. It comes from earning the opportunity for a second conversation.
Watch the full workshop below and read on for key insights.
The Goal is to Earn the Next Conversation
Many professionals attend Family Office events hoping to leave with investor commitments or immediate opportunities. However, Family Office relationships rarely develop that quickly. Family Offices meet hundreds of people every year, and most opportunities require extensive trust-building before any investment discussions become serious.
As Derrico explained, attendees need to reframe their expectations. You’re not attending an event to close a deal. You’re attending to either begin a relationship, strengthen an existing one, or position yourself for future conversations. The real objective is to earn the right to continue the dialogue after the event ends.
That shift in perspective changes everything about how professionals should prepare, interact, and follow up.
Preparation Begins Before the Event
One of the most common mistakes attendees make is showing up without a clear understanding of who’s attending the event. While many focus exclusively on polishing their pitch, successful networkers spend time researching attendees, speakers, firms, investment mandates, and conference participants before they arrive.
Legamaro recommends reviewing attendee and speaker lists, researching firms, and creating a system to keep important information organized. The goal here is to contextual awareness so conversations feel informed and intentional, rather than opportunistic.
It’s also important to understand who you’ll be meeting.
Many attendees imagine they’ll sit down directly with a Family Office principal. More often, they’re meeting investment professionals, CIOs, advisors, next-generation family members, or trusted gatekeepers who influence decisions. Understanding the role, priorities, and responsibilities of each person allows for much more productive conversations.
Stop Leading with Your Deal
Family Office event attendees are surrounded by investment opportunities. Most have heard countless versions of the same opening pitch. Leading with returns, performance metrics, or deal details often creates immediate resistance because it signals that you’re focused on the transaction rather than the relationship.
Many Family Office events aren’t primarily about dealmaking. Usually, attendees go to learn from peers, discuss governance challenges, explore legacy planning, understand emerging trends, and build trusted networks. Walking into those conversations with an aggressive sales approach can feel completely disconnected from why they’re there.
Instead, remain curious: ask thoughtful questions, learn about their interests, understand their priorities, and look for common ground. The strongest relationships often begin with conversations that have nothing to do with capital raising at all.
RELATED: How to Build Trusted Relationships with Family Offices
Humility Goes Further Than Credentials
Many professionals assume that impressive credentials will help establish credibility. In reality, Legamaro and Derrico argued that authenticity and humility often have a much greater impact.
Family Offices are used to evaluating people. They want to know if they can trust you to be a good partner. How do you treat others when there’s nothing obvious to gain?
Something as simple as introducing people at your table, helping a newcomer navigate the event, or engaging thoughtfully with staff can leave a lasting impression. Those interactions demonstrate character in ways a pitch deck never can.
As Legamaro noted, Family Offices don’t buy the “wow factor.” They respond to humility paired with intelligence.
Derrico shared that, as both an investor and capital raiser, she has become increasingly focused on evaluating people rather than simply evaluating opportunities. Market cycles, economic disruptions, and operational challenges reveal who someone really is as a partner.
The strongest connections are built through repeated interactions, thoughtful conversations, and consistent follow-through over time.
RELATED: Building a Family Office with Purpose Starts with Stronger Conversations
The Fortune is in the Follow-Up
Many attendees either fail to follow up entirely or send generic messages that provide little reason for the recipient to respond. Effective follow-up is specific, personalized, and valuable.
Reference a conversation you had. Share an article relevant to a challenge they mentioned. Make an introduction that could help them. Send a resource that demonstrates you were paying attention. The goal isn’t to restart a sales process. The goal is to continue building a relationship.
Derrico also emphasized the importance of maintaining notes about people you’ve met. Small details from conversations often become the foundation for meaningful future interactions. A thoughtful follow-up weeks later can be far more effective than a generic email sent immediately after the conference.
Most importantly, do what you say you’re going to do.
If you promise an introduction, make it. If you offer a resource, send it. Reliability creates credibility, and credibility creates trust.
Final Thoughts
Family Office networking isn’t about collecting business cards, delivering perfect elevator pitches, or finding shortcuts to capital. It’s about building trust through preparation, authenticity, curiosity, and consistency.
The professionals who stand out are the ones who listen carefully, provide value generously, follow through on their commitments, and approach every interaction with a genuine interest in building long-term relationships.
In an industry built on trust, the strongest strategy may also be the simplest: stop trying to win the deal and start earning the second conversation.
RELATED: 3 Key Insights Shaping the Future of the Family Office Landscape
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